Welcome back to another episode of Quarantine Compositions – my weekly series of original music I write just for you.

God is in the Radio. The Queens of Stone Age sang it, and guess what? It’s true! She even has her own frequency (duh!) 39.17 Mhz. Musically that’s somewhere between D and Eb.

Check it out.

It just so happens that “a group of researchers, sponsored by the Committee for the Scientific Examination of Religion (CSER), a new offshoot of the Committee for the Scientific Investigation of Claims of the Paranormal (CSICOP) lead by special investigator and magician James Randi, has managed to actually capture on tape some of those “divine” conversations between God and well-known television evangelist and faith healer Reverend Peter Popoff!”

You just cannot make this stuff up. “Special investigator and magician”. “TV evangelist and faith healer”. When all that comes flying at you in just one sentence (not to mention CSER and it’s “new” offshoot the CSICOP), you just gotta give it a minute and see where it’s going.

So, Reverend Peter Popoff (real name) of Upland, California, like all good faith healers, used to gather his flock together, call out the names, illnesses, and sometimes the addresses of people at his crusades, following it up with the ol’ “laying on of hands”, all while collecting a buck or two of non-taxable cash income from his followers.

Well, world-famous magician and psychic investigator James Randi wasn’t having any of Peter’s shenanigans, so with a few of his buddies, James set up a tape recorder and his trusty radio scanner.

When the scanner zeroed in on 39.17 MHz they heard a female voice saying, “Hello, Petey. I love you! I’m talking to you. Can you hear me? I’m looking up names right now.” Our “world-famous magician and psychic investigator” had hit the mother load, because “God” sounded exactly like the Reverend’s wife Elizabeth.

However, people being people just didn’t care and, you can still find more than a few video’s on YouTube that have been worked on “painstakingly for 6 months to create an audio track that will leave you with positive thoughts after just one listen of the masterpiece”, and promising you will have “the most blissful heavenly audio experience OF YOUR LIFE! “

I did *not* take 6 months to write this piece, and I’m not promising a thing, other than my track is freaking cool, and that anyone that goes to a revival show deserves to be separated from more than a few of their non-tax deductible dollars.

Until next week, “namaste”, wear a mask. Be kind to each other. Vote, and please send your non-tax deductible dollars to my Venmo account.

Turn me on, I’m a download:

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